They felt confident enough to be real, knowing full well I would write this information and share it with the world. Honestly, I’ll probably never look at a cantaloupe the same way again, but I am grateful I had this awkward, yet illuminating, discussion with my kids. With my curiosity quelled, I had to wonder if my quest for knowledge was a worthy endeavor. More: I have to be honest: Other parents scare me more than pedophilesīy the end of our conversation, I had the idea that my sons, and probably all teenage boys, used anything and everything at their disposal to masturbate. Really? I thought that was only a thing women in prison did. “And that time I used the cantaloupe?”Įven my husband was shocked at the cantaloupe revelation. “Oh, what about paper towel rolls?” my oldest added.
“It didn’t feel that good, so I only did it once.” “Yeah, but it was on low, don’t worry,” he reassured me. I’d lost my deadpan expression the moment I picture my son losing his penis in a vacuuming accident. “OK, don’t laugh, but one time I put my penis in the vacuum hose,” my youngest said.
Hey, who was I to judge? As a teen, I’d had an amorous moment or two with my favorite bottle of perfume, Love’s Baby Soft, which, if anyone remembers, was totally shaped like a dildo. As he spoke, my younger son nodded his head emphatically. Whatever is within reach, really,” he shared. Heck, I’ll use dirty laundry if it’s there. “Let’s see, there’s good old wadded-up toilet paper, towels, even shirts. Like machine gun fire, my eldest son listed his favorite masturbation props. I was in for a surprise with their answers. Naturally, I first turned to my husband and sons to learn more. More: Labiaplasty, vodka tampons and more scary teen “trends your kids are sick of hearing about Learning about socks, and laughing my ass off watching the Bridesmaids scene where a mom describes cracking her son’s comforter, made me curious about what other means boys employ to get their (pun intended) socks off. All it took was one time grabbing a sock that was hard as a rock and I was done. I swear I won’t even touch his laundry anymore. “Socks?” I had never heard of boys sexualizing slippers. “I don’t know about condoms,” my friend Tammy said, “but I found out my son Charlie was using socks.” Oh, well, OK,” was all I managed to say.Ī week later, while out for drinks with my girlfriends, who also had teen boys, I asked if that was normal. His hesitation should have been my first clue. More: This teenage girl just got fired for speaking up about inequalityĮven as my own sons grew, I didn’t understand just how resourceful boys could be, until I questioned my then-12-year-old about why he had a giant box of condoms in his bedroom. Like, so good I would make sure to climb that pole every morning and every lunch.” But one day when I climbed something weird happened. It might also be on my right ear but not as much but Idk.“At first,” he explained, “I just climbed because I liked to see how fast I could get to the top. Rarely it goes to both of my ears or spreads but mainly it's been on my left ear. I just want to get it checked out just to be on the safe side. But on a daily basis I can hear it but it's no big deal. But I still hear it til today like this moment. but I figured it was normal but now since I gotten smarter and mature I decided to look up what it was. I think I might either have the mineres disease or tinnitus or whatever because for years I've been hearing ringing in my ears or left ear mostly. Meaning I know it won't happen but my anxiety is taking over making me scared and rarely panic sometimes to where I have my mom sleep with me. I believe in ghost but that experience never happend with me. I just think if I try to sleep peacefully then I would hear whispers or I would feel something rub on me and open my eyes someone would be there. The other is that I'm afraid sleeping by myself in the dark. Then when I wake up everyday I feel like I need to sleep in more because I'm tired and sleepy still. Not like through until the middle of the night but my bed time is usually around 10:30 or suppose to be but I usually fall asleep between 12:30 to about 2 the most. And I can't sleep well at night and I stay up late. Most of the times I overthink and I don't want that feeling. And everyday I fidget or walk around non stop back and forth and when I do I think. Then everyday it keeps happening I keep thinking and then I over think and it could be positive but if it's negative then it will get me scared or have me keep thinking about it. I usually worry about things that shouldn't be worried about it shouldn't be worried about that much. For the past months I've been experiencing an anxiety like feeling.